Week 20
View from the houseboats
We are continuing to settle into the new routine. We taught Theo about high vs. low frequency sound waves this week (who knows why) and it was a thankfully lower-frequency week in the house (at least for me). I’ve now been into my office a few times for various reasons and it feels less strange. I feel like I’m making good progress on big picture thinking, communicating with mentors, my own research & manuscripts, mentoring others….wait, when I write that list things I realize are going really well at work, and reasonably well at home. Hooray!
Gratitude & appreciation
After I sent last week’s newsletter I learned another collaborator/mentee got an R&R on a paper!
I took advantage of some quiet time in the house last weekend and finished coding the prion dataset (woo hoo!) and started translating the NHATS data into an updated draft results section – two activities that needed some larger uninterrupted quiet blocks of time when I had energy.
I went for a bike ride last weekend with neighbor Scout (both wearing masks) which was a novel experience. Scout is Theo’s local hero – if something breaks on the dock he says “Scout will fix it” and that’s usually accurate. I also got in a few other bike rides this week.
I spent Sunday morning watching Frozen and Frozen II with Theo – I’m determined to help him enjoy musicals – and all week was treated to random detailed plot questions. This is my version of memory exercises, I guess?
I’m really appreciating this new life schedule. The pets wake Sam up early and he can’t sleep in so he goes for his bike ride early. I get extra sleep, first dibs on coffee, and some work in before Theo gets up or while he’s having breakfast and (usually) visiting with my mom by video. Then I get a bike ride while Sam takes Theo in. The extra sleep and time to think before work (while riding) is doing wonders for my professional work right now.
A work project that launched a new “intervention” with a new team in July is really coming together and it’s exciting to watch.
A cool local article about the float-in concerts my dock is hosting (they are fun to attend when our schedule with kid allows).
I made a new batch of kombucha today (and apparently let it go a week or two too long – a little vinegary!
(Re)Learnings and observations
Ask people to unpack what they mean: Sometimes it takes a few hours (or days) after a conversation before I realize I didn’t understand something a colleague/friend/mentor said. Instead of spending mental energy wondering what it meant, a friend reminded me that I can ask for a clarifying conversation and simply ask them to unpack what they said. A great simple reminder and one I will need to remember to implement more frequently.
Beware of the emotions behind the emotions: A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I realized I have an undercurrent of negativity around some projects that feel “behind schedule”, especially if involves having to report to funders or coauthors about progress. One solution is to do a better job tracking (and therefore estimating in the future) how long projects will take (and triple my estimates in the near-term). Another solution is to do fewer things (so I have more time for each thing I am doing). Another is to simply practice a more positive and forgiving internal narrative. A mentor made the astute observation that my timeline guilt seems to based on a fear of disappointing others (e.g. fear is the emotion behind the guilt/negativity). Why do I share this? I think many people end up with confusing emotions about some element of their research/work, and it can be helpful to attend to in order to figure out less complicated relationships with things we spend so much energy pursuing.
Work doesn’t love you back: This is not my line, but a reminder (for all of us) that we need to take time amid everything else that’s going on to take care of ourselves, to find the joy in daily life, to enjoy our relationships and family and friends, even if by zoom. Every moment of every work day does not need to be a flat out sprint – and indeed, we don’t work well that way for long. I’m probably thinking about this more now because more of my days feel like sprints, as opposed to the 4 months without childcare when my mornings meandered, quite literally, up a hill, and my late afternoons were academic sprints.
Lowering standards: UCSF has an institutional membership with the National Center for Faculty Development and Diversity, which means grad students, postdocs, and faculty can join for free and get access to things like Monday Motivator emails with great tidbits of advice and recommendations to increase productivity. On the 20th, they had this great line that rung home: “when academics feel like they’re losing control, they try to do everything in their power to over-control situations, both in their professional and personal lives”. This was in the context of an email suggesting using the technique of lowering (recalibrating) goals and standards to reduce resistance to productivity. You’ll see more about this in my goals below.
Actions to support Black and other people of color: Donated to the ARM (Academic Research Mom) Fund that to make small grants to parents of color for childcare expenses via the HBCU Foundation. Also donated to Black Lives Matter. Lots of little efforts on Twitter or Instagram to amplify voices.
Update on goals from last week
Send updated NHATS manuscript to senior author: Drafted and sent messy next draft and got feedback – hooray! Still chipping away at intro/discussion while statistician adds some more analyses.
Journal twice: Success!
New request this week! Think about what project(s) in your professional life is most important to you – especially those really big projects that are harder to chip away at and easy to procrastinate. This can be easy in a PhD program – it’s the dissertation, or possibly job searching – but can get more confusing over time. Try to identify one TINY step you can take towards that important big passion project and report back at the end of next week whether you took it.
SMALL goals for next week
(e.g. Not all the things that I hope are done by the end of the week. One small step towards one important thing in each area. A colleague helped me overcome a hurdle once by just daring me to open a file – that spirit revisited below):
Regular work: Step 1: create new table shells for the Prion project. Step 2: Open the coded data that I will need to review to populate one of the tables.
Passion project: I have a couple personal essays I’ve partially drafted but not done anything with since the pandemic. I’m going to pick one, open it, and read it.
Whole-self-care: Meditate once for 3 minutes
As in past weeks, I invite you to report in on your wellbeing, share your goal of a tiny step towards a passion project (and perhaps a second goal of a collaboration) and report in on your progress from last week's goals.
Thinking of you and hoping you and your loved ones stay healthy and safe.
Krista